In my day...

She smiles, radiant, playful, unmistakable presence, a keen mind used to making a path if one isn’t available, and then pulling along all who wish to come. Confident, most assuredly. When in doubt a small child comes out, hesitant, curious, frustrated with herself for not getting something she knows she’s fully capable of getting, though her body seems to be taking its time with it, having its own way with her. “Educate me”, it says, driven, and she looks off to the side, letting pressure and resistance create imagery in her head, a path, something for her to grasp in a new way. She tests it, plays with its limits, and eases into new thought.

She grins, a little tilt to her head that says she is one-hundred percent mischievous in thought and will. She has an open honesty about her, sometimes direct and unabashed, though given to expression only to those she cares about, or doesn’t care about. Those in-between get a hesitance, an “I’m not sure where you ‘fit’ yet” stirring; externally it displays as a quick glance and thoughtful, almost “disinterested” poise. But internally, she’s working, filtering, analyzing in a way she may not even understand, but intuits accurately. Oh, she’s playful, a sputter of self-effacing laughter parts from her and then turns to cartoon curious, a light plaything to briefly rise above the stress she wholeheartedly put herself gleefully in.

He is loud, oh what an expression, volume limiter broken or never installed. He has a core of joy he can tap into at will, radiating through his body, through the stern sharpness of his experience and out to us as wit and self-humor that spills laughter from us - we simply cannot help it. He captures us, we wait for what he’s going to say next. He has that unique blend of “I am macho…but don’t hurt me.”

His is reserved contemplation, a whole mind full of wisdom-bits collected from the oddest places and then assembled in that mercurial mix of childish wonder and clarity. His gift is his patience, his empathy, his ability to communicate what he knows just how you need it. He is that humble, wise man on top of the mountain contemplating the universe…while watching Zatoichi: The The Blind Swordsman on DVD. 

She is clever as her smile, a warm beauty with a mind troubled by her experiences and steadfast faith that she is where she needs to be, though she may not fully care for it at times. She is dutiful to the cause, though flexes when I am around, something I take note of secretly and appreciate immensely. She has just the right amount of soft edge to prod me, challenge me, at times humor me, and most importantly, respect me, as she does others. Perhaps a little more. She gives of her time and hopes so for the best. She is that touch of care, a warm blanket given from afar…and she might, just might backhand you if you get that blanket dirty. 

These are just some of the important people in my life. My daily existence is populated by their grace and I am fortunate. When they read this, they will know I am have described them accurately, others meeting them, knowing them, will agree I have done them justice. I left out a lot in the descriptions, this is but a small part of their essence, but important, defining. Who wouldn’t want to know them, befriend them? I mention nothing pointless (in this context) like skin color, style of clothing, religion, position in society, wealth, weight. I have described who they are as it matters when we connect. 


It is their value that colors my world.

How to Inspire

How to inspire

Little else gets us moving positively in life than inspiration, whether that inspiration comes as a result of frustration with something that goes against your grain, or from something that completely meshes with it and lifts you to another level, one that clarifies or simplifies, or shows you a new way of looking at things. 

The following are ways, from my direct and observational experience, of having to inspire people for decades, pushing them past physical endurance limits as well as mental barriers that kept them in place, kept them bound to a plane they weren’t even aware they were on.

I am often dismayed by the number of women, specifically, who succumb to this “falling in place” and staying there. It’s often expected of men to push past things, to “man up”  and to leave the providence of physical matters to them, and all that hooey. Wonderful inspiration for those men who achieve it, wonderful for the male gender.

If you haven’t noticed (beyond the pleasant obvious), women have a physical structure, musculature, mind and spirit to carry them quite capably through this life - and certainly through yours. 

I knew this from early on in my childhood. My mom did the work of any man, and often had more endurance doing it. Not sure if that was just from determination, but it equaled out in the end either way. 

Are there physical difference in body size and gene expression? Absolutely. Differences in testosterone levels? Most assuredly. But you find this among the male of the species as well. Education, support, hard work and persistence level the playing field quite a bit regardless of gender. 

I know this personally; I have a chipped tooth from a powerful overhand jab from a female student of mine (trust me, you’d have no idea she could do it looking at her), as well as enough scrapes, bruises, joint hyperextensions and chokes to keep me sharp and on top of my game when I’m around the “weaker” sex. (In my twisted view, that’s inspiring)

Personally, I think the “weaker sex” identifies a person who lets ego and emotion trump logic, knowledge and experience. 

By example

Like in the examples above, people who surmount obstacles, or surpass accepted norms regardless of gender, catch our eyes, minds and spirits. Where it crosses boundaries, such as when women perform feats of physical skill (typically a male-dominated field), and in some cases mental, as in the sciences, men are inspired beyond their gender. The obverse is true, too. 

It often takes someone working within or breaching the fields of your possible and imagined abilities to catch your attention. When gender-crossing occurs like that, then it is inspiring regardless of the source. 

Having a physical personae demonstrate inspiring values, traits, or feats from a distance is inspiring all in itself, but having that person directly in your life, someone you can stand in the presence of, raises the inspiriting factor by an order of magnitude. Some of the men and women I train and have trained with literally stun, spark unabashed smiles, and otherwise elevate one’s mentality of what was accepted in life. 

And just so you know, regarding inspiration, age isn’t a factor.

By being honest

Being honest with and about yourself lays everything on the line and is terrifying for many due to the desire of wanting to be liked, loved, or simply accepted. Follow your path honestly. If you don’t know what that means, or haven’t found your path…well, I guess I’ll have to write about that sometime. Suffice it to say that everyone has one, a path driven by your own internal inspiration, something heard in the quiet of a park, or residing in your childhood dreams.

When you are honest you allow others to see the truth that is you, simple as that. People deny their truth for the examples given above, because of how it will make them seem to the people around you. The funny thing about that “need to fit in” mentality, it lessens with age and alcohol. 

Accept others

Accept others as they are so they can be honest expressing themselves - allowing a person to be themselves around and with you is inspiring. It helps remove that “need to be accepted” and puts it in the category that you are accepted.

By standing out

People along later on in life get to the realization that there is more behind them than there is ahead of them and through biological changes and experiential evaluation, one’s thought processes change. As we collect experience in life we tend (many of us) to discover just what is important, what matters. 

And when you look at the people of the world who are inspiring, or who stand out as figureheads, or examples of powerful personalities, you realize they aren’t in that position because they do their darndest to fit in. They stand out from the crowd because they stand out from the crowd! They follow their path regardless of how it looks or is accepted by those around them. They are honest to their truth no matter how the chips fall.

This differs from the mentality of one who wants to stand out for the purpose of standing out. That is something without foundation and the energy of which wanes easily. People stand out in life because they listen to that inner drive in them and follow it wherever it may take them.

Take satisfaction in the fact that you are completely unique.

It’s the commingling of individuals in a free environment that promotes growth in myriad form. The interaction of which supports, sustains, and elevates the human condition beyond the base of one. But it starts with one. One individual, unique to all in the world of billions, finding their truth, expressing their gifts and daring to stand out from the crowd. Its effect is like a flame passing among unlit candles, sometimes even just the spark of which is enough to ignite fully. 

Exercise your greatness - build your greatness

Having a mind and body that is refreshed, strong, and resilient only increases the effectiveness of your gifts, even if your gift is simply being the best greeter at Walmart - such a job is actually valuable. I’ve had my spirits lifted in my day by someone who greeted me with such enthusiasm and vibrance, it was hard to do otherwise. And the reverse it true as well.

Having a strong foundation physically, mentally or spiritually has a bleed-off effect of enriching your talent, your gifts, and their expression (it also helps you live longer). Like the greeter example, our energy, positive or negative, bleeds off onto other people and can be long lasting, coloring one’s day, and yes, even changing someone’s life.

Find new ways to better yourself, or old ways that you know work. If your talent is art-related, then take classes, or read up on and try new ways of expression in it, or try a different medium. Whatever your talent or drive, seek out ways to refine it, to improve upon it, increase the depth of your knowledge of it and exercise it. As in writing and finding your own voice, you have to write, write, write. Practice makes you.

Dare to dream - dare to pursue the dream

Going beyond what is accepted as norm requires vision and persistence. Persistence by itself is simply a rodent running in an exercise wheel. Vision, dreams, are a path to opportunity as unyet realized. Period. Coupled together you have things that inspire the world. Dare to dream, dare to pursue the dream. Put your well-meaning critics in the dustbin of the ordinary.